Hind Lick

Two Texans were having the blue plate special at their favorite watering hole when they heard this awful choking sound. They turned around to see a lady, a few bar stools down, turning blue from wolfing down an Armadillo Burger too fast. The first Texan said to the other, "Think we ought ta' help?"

"Yep," said the second Texan.

The first Texan got up and walked over to the lady and asked, "Kin yew breathe?" She shook her head no. "Kin yew speak?" She again shook her head no.

With that, he helped her to her feet, lifted up her skirt, pulled down her panties and started to lick her on the cheeks and there abouts. She was so shocked, she coughed up the obstruction and began to breathe, with great relief.

The first Texan turned back to his friend and said, "Funny how that there Hind Lick Maneuver works every time!"

Joke of The Day

This old man and his wife were sitting on the porch rocking in their chairs. They'd been married for like 60 years. They just sat there rocking back and forth when all of a sudden Grandma reaches back and just slaps the hell out of Grandpa. He rubbed his face. Ma what ya do that for he asked. She looked at him and said for being a sorry fuck for 60 years They went back to rocking and in a couple of minutes Grandpa lays back and knocks the hell out of Grandma. He knocks her out of her chair, off the porch and into the yard. She rubs her face and asks Pa what you go and do that for He looked at her sternly for knowing the difference he answered....

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